Take it With a Grain of Salt …

By Madeleine Kando

It is hard these days to do the right thing to stay healthy. Every time you think you know what’s good for you, some study comes along and says that what you thought was good for you is either bad, not enough or will downright kill you.

Amongst many other things, we are told to eat more fish to get enough vitamin D, take up dancing to avoid Alzheimer’s disease and drink at least 8 glasses of water a day to flush out toxins.I happen to like fish, so for me that’s not a problem, and I run a dance studio, so if they are right I will probably die of something other than Alzheimer. But the water.. well, it makes me pee too much and I confess that I have not kept up with the ‘8 glasses of water a day’ advise. So, if they are right, I will start shriveling up like an old apple soon. I just cannot afford to leave my pre-school ballet classes every 5 minutes to go to the loo. It would be like letting the lions loose in a zoo. So I was relieved to hear that some doctors are now saying that drinking too much poses a far greater health risk than not enough.

But what makes us so gullible to all this so-called ‘expert’ advice? Are we all so insecure that we don’t trust our own judgement?

Could it have to do with fear? Fear of the big IF word? “IF I do this I will be safe from that.” “IF I drink 8 glasses of water a day I will be healthy and able to run a marathon.” This kind of reasoning reminds me of Sarah, one of my 3 year old ballet students. She barged into the studio one day beaming: “I am going to dance real good today, Miss Madeleine. I am wearing my tutu.”

There is a saying in the French language: ‘Avec des si on mettrait Paris en bouteille. (“With ifs you could put Paris in a bottle”. Also known as "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.") In fact, every country has one of those expressions to denote the IF word. Here is one from Canada: “Si ma tante en avait, on l’appellerait mon oncle” (If my aunt had any we would call her my uncle).

Think about it. If the word ‘IF’ didn’t exist, there wouldn’t be any way to experience fear. Anything you can describe with an ‘IF’ expression is not real. If something is already happening you have other things on your mind then thinking: ‘what IF this car wasn’t about to hit me?’ The car IS about to hit you and you can bet your sweet bippy that you would sprint out of the car’s way, unless you are suicidal of course.

So whenever you hear of another study that is proving your ‘staying healthy strategy’ wrong, take my advice: just wait a little while. Hold off on the fish, the water, the dancing. Soon another study will come along and prove the exact opposite of what the ‘experts’ are telling you today.

The best advise regarding your health is this: take everything coming from ‘experts’ with a grain of salt.
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Lekker Puh (Dutch for 'You cannot have it, so there!')

by Madeleine Kando

I am about to leave Holland to go back to America, wondering how I feel about my most recent visit to my Vaterland. It's been educational.

As usual I have a constant feeling of being an outside observer with a fairly critical eye tainted with subjectivity since I grew up here and have many complex emotional bonds to this clean, well-organized, little country. I like its physical beauty, the impressive vistas of bright green pasture dotted with cows, sheep and church steeples. The gorgeous farm houses with their thatched roofs. The immense Dutch sky that is so typical of Holland with its ever changing colors and texture. Yes, it is a very special place. Visually.And then there are the Dutch. If only there weren't so many of them. If only there were a few that are not so... Dutch. So lacking in imagination and a sense of adventure. I would like to meet some Dutch people who don't constantly live by the rules, who show some humor, some ability to improvise. Although the Dutch have been good to us, the Kando clan, I am constantly confronted with their unlimited capacity to conform and their total inability to think and act outside the box. And let's not forget generosity. The Dutch are generous politically, they have harbored refugees for centuries, but when it comes to small, everyday affairs, it is as if the Dutch are suffering from a split personality. They turn from Dr. Jekyl into Mr. Hyde.

As a tourist I have often experienced something I'd like to call the "lekker puh" mentality of the Dutch. By this, I mean the subtitle, above, or something like this: "Haha, I got something you want, but you can't have it. Not because it would cost me anything if I gave it to you, but because it's so much more fun to just say 'No"."
In other words, a childish impulse which most of us enjoyed up to age 6 or 7.

The lekker puh policy originated in a small establishment that actually goes by that name: the "Lekker Puh" cafe in the small village of Groet: all you need to do is ask for some extra hot water for your tea and the "lekker puh" policy is triggered automatically: '"we don't have to give you extra hot water for your tea, lekker puh."

But the "lekker puh" policy has become very popular in other establishments throughout Holland. I have had the privilege of experiencing this policy in places as far removed from each other as the Northern Province of Holland and even on some of the islands off the coast of this beautiful country. You only have to ask for some extra lemon wedges for your tea in Camperduin, a small beach resort in the Northern Province, and immediately the "lekker puh" policy goes into effect: 'we don't have to give you an extra lemon wedge for your tea, lekker puh.’

Even on the remote island of Vlieland the "lekker puh" policy is in full swing. At the famous Golden Tulip Hotel where we booked a room for 2 guests, you could find the lekker puh policy in action: "'we don't have to give you two bars of soap, you can share one, lekker puh'."

Unfortunately I am leaving tomorrow, back to America. If I could stay I could give you more examples of this very popular practice. I forgot to mention all the times that I had to wipe my fingers on my coat sleeves after I had squeezed the minuscule lemon wedges into my cup of tea, for want of napkins. This was so prevalent throughout Holland's horeca industry that I finally ended up carrying napkins of my own. I knew that the next cafe I would visit, the lekker puh policy would be implemented: "'we don't have to give you a napkin, lekker puh". In fact, I suspect that the "lekker puh" policy is one of the reasons Holland is so affluent. Compared to the United States, where napkins, cups of hot water, bars of soap are not rationed like food coupons during a famine, Holland must have saved millions of dollars by not giving those items out freely to whomever dares to ask for them. Is there a lesson to be learned for us naive Americans? Should we adopt Holland's "lekker puh" practice? You tell me.
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Homeland Security in Action

By Madeleine Kando

My flight back was uneventful and actually went by fast. I was sitting next to a real big guy and originally thought, 'just my luck. I am sitting next to a meat head who is going to hog the arm rest for the next 7 hours'. But we started to chat and he turned out to be very interesting to talk to.

He was in law enforcement and had been a soldier in Operation Desert Storm. He lived in a small town in Western Massachusetts and had grown up in Vermont. He was returning from a 5-day visit to Amsterdam to meet some old army buddies. Read more...

The 'Duh Test

by Madeleine Kando

The older I get the more I am confronted with the problem of finding enough time to read, listen to and watch the enormous amount of information we are all confronted with over our media tools: t.v., radio, papers and the internet. There is nothing wrong with information per se, but when there is too much of it, it tends to become toxic. I mean too much information is like too much rain: some of it is good for plants, too much of it will drown them and make them rot.In other words, we are suffering from information overload. One sure sign of information overload is one’s inability to produce the appropriate emotional response to information. Here is an example: I am driving my car, listening to NPR. The newscaster informs me that serial killer X has just eaten the cut up remains of his latest victim. Without interruption, the same voice continues to inform me that we might expect some rain within the next 24 hours. I don’t bat an eye. Just waiting for the next bit of news. THAT is a true indication of ‘information overload’. I am suffering from the toxic fumes of too much information.

So I thought it might be useful to devise a test. This test will help us, poor saps, who are subject to this endless torrent of information, to protect us, like an umbrella if you will.

Here is an example of the test, which I have named the ‘duh test’.Information:‘SMOKING IS BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH’.

Answer this information with the test: ‘well … duh!’If the information does not pass the test, scrap that information.

Don’t you find yourself often listening or watching programs that pretty much state the obvious? Even certain books that are on the best-seller’s list would not pass my ‘duh test’. Although I admit, if a book is well-written the writing itself makes up for the content. One such book is ‘In Defense of Food’ by Michael Pollan. Yes, the content of the book does not pass the test. I have known since I was 10 years old that vegetables are good for you. That lucky charms are bad for you. But it helps to have someone who writes so well reiterate my belief for me. So, in this case the ‘duh test’ is an affirmation. Meaning: ‘see, I was right all along’.

I highly recomment this test to you. It will save numerous hours of staring at the boob tube or ruining your eyes in front of your computer. Every time you read or watch something, say that mantra: ‘well.. duh’. The time saved by applying this simple test could be applied to going for a walk with your dog, planting your garden or wondering what you will make for dinner.
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About European versus American education

By Madeleine Kando and Tom Kando

The other day a Dutch friend asked me what 'M.Ed.' stands for, because I sent a letter to IFAW about mother's book and I signed it with Madeleine Kando, M.Ed. So this is what I wrote back:

There are three levels of higher education in the US:
(1): BA and BS (Bachelor of Arts or Science).
(2): MA, MS and MEd (Master of Arts or Science or Education) and
(3): Ph.D. and Ed.D. (Doctor of Philosophy or Education).

A bit like in the old days in Holland, when you had a Kandidaats, a Doctoraal, etc. Typically, it takes 4 years to achieve the first of these levels - the BA - so if you graduate from High School at eighteen, as most kids do, you can expect to get a BA or a BS at 22, if you apply yourself and daddy pays all your bills.

"College" basically refers to this four-year education, and it is also called "undergraduate" education. In America, therefore, the Baccalaureate refers to this four-year degree which you receive four years beyond high school , whereas the European Baccalaureat (le "bachot" in France, for example), refers to your High School degree, at eighteen. To make things even more complicated, the word "University" in the US can include a 4-year college but more properly refers to institutions that offer the more advanced degrees of MA and Ph.D. Read more...

About Madeleine Kando

Madeleine Kando , MEd, is a Registered Movement Therapist and a graduate of Lesley College. Ms. Kando was educated in France and Holland. She holds a degree in Linguistics from the University of Utrecht and speaks four languages fluently. She is the author of 'Playing with Language'  and has written various articles on bilingual education. She is the founder and director of The SmartStars Program, a Creative Arts Program for young children.

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About Us

This is a Political/Social Blog. It offers opinions on current political/social issues as well as more general topics. We are both long-time residents of the United States but we were raised and educated both in Europe and the US . We enjoy comparing the cultures and social norms of the two continents. Occasionally, we will sound opinionated, even biased. We welcome your comments and your opinions, whether they agree with ours or not. Happy reading.

Madeleine Kando is a Registered Movement Therapist and a graduate of Lesley College. Ms. Kando was educated in France and Holland. She holds a degree in Linguistics from the University of Utrecht and speaks four languages fluently. She is the co-author of 'Playing with Language' and has written various articles on bilingual education. She is the founder and director of The SmartStars Program, a Multiple Intelligences Language Program.
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Tom Kando is a retired professor of sociology and an author. He has always worn two hats - that of the professional academic sociologist and that of the creative author. As the former, he has produced dozens of scholarly, refereed research articles and books. As the latter, he has written several novels, essays and articles, even publishing his own newspaper. Tom enjoys exploring topics relating to social psychology, marriage and family life, criminology, politics and social issues. To read samples of his work, please visit his Personal Publications and Professional Publications pages.

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